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Oluthando...: Never too old to learn

Never too old to learn

I used to be skinny before my son(44kg was my lowest, 50 my highest), and now I weigh 58kg. So everyone tells me I look good for a mom of 2, thats what I hate about this...FOR A MOM OF 2? I just want to look good, PERIOD.

One of my collegues returned from her maternity leave and she is as skinny as she was before the baby. I was so ~~jealous~~ envious, thinking 'oh my Gosh, some people are so lucky'. 'She probably didn't struggle after the birth of her daughter, I'm positive she was on top of her game. Unlike me who spent every single day of my maternity leave crying, obsessing about bottles, couldn't breastfeed, being a total FAILURE at this motherhood thing. And on top of it she lost all the weight. Why couldn't I have had that wonderful experience. '

Today I found out that she had Severe Postnatal depression. I've never been so embarassed in my life. Embarassed because I assumed she was fine, I never once stopped to ask her how she's doing. Embarassed because I should know better, I've bn through such dark days that air was all I could eat, days when the anxiety was so bad I would loose 5kg in a week. I'm learning everyday to be considerate, to just stop and ask the person next to you if they are OK, to accept and love myself as I am and mostly to never ever wish to walk in someone elses shoes.

What big lesson are you learning at the moment?