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<!-- /*--><!--/*--> Oluthando...: Fulfilling my purpose

Fulfilling my purpose

I opened my mouth and for a minute nothing came out

think of something, anything, remember how much you dreamed of this day...God please give me the strength to do this...

"Hi, I'm Lebo, a chemical engineer, a wonderful wife and a blessed mother of two...I am a postnatal depression survivor..."

The coffee shop was instantly filled with silence, everyone staring at me.  And I went on, I flowed, I was able to articulate myself with words and my story was heard, my message went across.  Loud and Clearly.  I know God was with me in that moment because all the fear dissappeared.  Yesterday I was invited to talk to +/-30 ladies about my postnatal experience, at a very larney restaurant over the most delicious breakfast.  The writers of 'Recognising Postnatal Depression' thought that I would definitely be a great speaker, and invited me to their mini book launch.

See I hate public speaking, I'm one of those people who shiver, that shaky voice and yes, everything just goes blank...

I have tried the whole 'imagine the crowd naked' trick....ha, it made things worse.

I tried writing my speeches down, I'd shake so bad you'd see the paper moving uncontrollably.

Ok, maybe I wasn't that bad, but I wasn't at a point were I wanted to be.  Until yesterday.  And now its as clear as daylight, this is definitely my purpose right there.  Educating and helping mothers in the midst of postnatal depression.  10months ago, I would never have thought I'd be doing this, 10months ago I wanted to die.  But now I'm alive, I survived, I'm enjoying life.  And so I will help get the message out there, in every way that I can.